Dirty World News

I was speaking with my co-worker Meredith today about my Twitter usage and SMS messaging in general, and I mentioned to her that I don’t really text all that much. Though the technology is useful and relatively cheap, my cell phone has the tiniest of keypads and it’s simply easier to wait until I’m in front of a real keyboard if there’s something that needs to be typed.

The conversation turned toward the popularity of texting among teens and, at one point, I actually said that “these kids today love texting to each other among their circle of friends.”

And it was at that exact moment that I realized (perhaps with a bit of disgust) that I’m old. Maybe not old old, but certainly sounding a bit too much like a soulless marketing consultant and fully formed adult instead of the man-child I’ve been masquerading as for the past decade.

So I think I’m going to leave work early today. I’ll be crying myself to sleep under the electric blanket if you need me, so I’d appreciate it if you could please turn off your fancy ringtones.

And get the hell off my lawn.

Posted by Doug on March 20, 2008 at 04:03 PM | Permalink | | Comments (2)
Filed Under: General

I’ve spent the past half hour playing around with an old 16mm Bolex camera that my brother Tom gave to me last year as a gift and, thanks to the enormously resourceful Bolex Collector website, I’ve tracked down the serial number (#58725) and identified the model as a 1950 model H-16 Deluxe.

Actually, that should be “I think I’ve identified the model.” According to vintage camera buff Michael Tisdale, it’s incredibly difficult to differentiate between the H-16 Leader, Standard and Deluxe models:

These terms were only used to differentiate between models that included different styles of viewfinder accessories. These viewfinders could be purchased or installed later; a fact which, today, makes it nearly impossible to identify early H cameras as Leader, Standard or Deluxe.

Though I used a Bolex in one of my college film classes about a dozen years ago, I haven’t actually shot anything with this one. As much fun as that might be, it’s just too damn expensive to shoot 16mm these days. But I do enjoy playing around with it, if only as a reminder to dig out the rest of my vintage film cameras and identify them as well.

Posted by Doug on March 08, 2008 at 05:02 PM | Permalink |
Filed Under: Film & TV

“We’ll fight them in the kitchen, we’ll fight them in the restaurant, we’ll fight them on the dining room table…”

A short animation from Tourist Pictures, Food Fight is “an abridged history of war, from World War II to present day, told through the foods of the countries in conflict.”

Posted by Doug on February 29, 2008 at 12:05 PM | Permalink | | Comments (2)
Filed Under: Film & TV, Food & Beverage

I just turned down a cash reward for returning a lost Blackberry that I found at a gas station the other night. The owner of the Blackberry thrusted a rolled up bill toward me from behind the wheel of her Cadillac Escalade and declared that “this is probably the best thing that’s going to happen to you today.” I politely declined.

What she didn’t realize is that the value of everyone realizing how selflessly awesome I am after telling them about this vastly outweighs the monetary value of the cash.

Posted by Doug on February 23, 2008 at 03:41 PM | Permalink | | Comments (1)
Filed Under: Humor

Just when you lose your faith in humanity, someone goes and does something that makes you entirely rethink your pessimism about the brotherhood of mankind. That’s right…someone turned my lost BluBlockers into the Lost & Found at MTV. Huzzah!

Taking BluBlocker photographs is one of my dorkier hobbies, right up there with shortwave radio and quizzing co-workers on Saved by the Bell trivia. Now if only someone would invent an actual BluBlocker lens (or better yet, include it as an automatic setting on digital cameras), I wouldn’t have to do it myself (essentially sticking one of the frames from the glasses in front of the lens).

Posted by Doug on February 19, 2008 at 12:39 PM | Permalink | | Comments (1)
Filed Under: Photography

What do you do with 400 free bags of Cheetos? Dump them into the office of an unsuspecting co-worker while he’s out at lunch, of course.

Continue reading "Ultimate Cheetos Prank" »

Posted by Doug on February 12, 2008 at 03:20 PM | Permalink | | Comments (101)
Filed Under: Food & Beverage

I taped this appearance on The Maury Show at the end of December, but it didn’t air until this past Monday because (as one of the producers told me) “we’re saving it for sweeps.” And I got a voicemail today saying that the ratings were “huge.” Which was really exciting, until I remembered that it’s probably just because Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuoco were also on the program.

Sadly, this could very well be the highlight of my professional career.

*hangs head in shame*

Posted by Doug on February 06, 2008 at 10:33 PM | Permalink | | Comments (2)
Filed Under: Film & TV, Video